The tale of an epiphany which is the cause of much excitement…

Once upon a time a young(ish) woman sat on her bed sniffling and snotting (due to being full of stinky cold) and reading through her journal from the last year when She noticed that much of what was written there; the insecurity she had felt, the sadness, pain, loss, anger and so on, seemed to be based on her reaction to what she thought other people’s view of her was.

She had a little epiphany! She realised Her sense of self, of who she is, until now has been based on her search for other people’s approval of her.

It walloped her in her solar plexus and radiated outwards through the rest of her as she realised the freedom she could find by going inwards and finding out what her opinion of herself is, to find out who she really is rather than who she thinks she should1 be for others to approve of (love) her.

Realising too She has actually reached a level of self acceptance where this idea fills her with excitement not fear because being herself is the only authentic thing She can really do. YAY!

I guess by now you’ve realised “she” is me… because you’re all very intelligent people after all (you’re reading this aren’t you? J hee hee!)

I felt little chunks of armour fall away (mostly in the form of letting my shoulders drop) and my body filled with delight. I love how my body and emotions are so connected. I find it a fascinating relationship- the mirroring of my emotion in my body. I’m quite hopeful that in getting to know myself and the ensuing confidence I know this will bring will enable me to let a lot of this tension go, which will quite frankly, be a joy!

So I’m off to do a little jig of excitement, because right now, meditative OMMMM doesn’t work for me!

*Jumps and taps heels together in a jaunty fashion*

 

1
Should is a nasty word – It SHOULD be abolished.

 

 

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One Response

  1. Fantastic! I’ve just had that epiphany too. Isn’t it great when epiphanies happen like that?

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